UnionMaine

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MSEASEIU DISSOLVES CALLS IT QUITS

The MSEASEIU said their critics were right!

The light dawned when the union realized that their critics were right. They had been political when there was no reason. To quote a spokesperson for the former union. “We realized that all anyone had to do was ask for a raise” there is no need for a union to affect the legislature.

At this point secrets the union has been hiding for years came out!

Bargaining, retirement, health care, and so called “benefits” have all been revealed to be costs to the employer! The deception must end!

The membership has overwhelmingly demanded that every State worker not only pay more for health care, they have decided that it will better the industrial outlook if they do away with health care completely.

A nation wide study funded by Wall to Wall mart and the Republican party blew the lid off a dirty little secret. Employees that are sick, cost money and if they were to just die, the fittest and hardest working employees would be left. By weeding out sick (slackers) it will free up the employer to pay wages as they see fit and the raises for increased production will be announced after a study period of no more than one to two generations.

The current union has also decided that by dissolving immediately the stress level on management, knowing that there will be no more grievances, will ensure that all management will be so happy the employees will never have to (or be able to) complain again.

After a further review of so called “benefits” it has been discovered that every “sick day” and “vacation day” are actually time when the employee is not at work! This was so shocking that employees stormed union headquarters demanding an end to the shame and demanding more work time and less play. The slackers still whining about family and children were immediately shouted down.

They whine “I want a life”. You have a life. You have a job. Some corporations cannot afford even a middle sized country. How can you be so selfish to want to buy new clothes every year?

As an extension of the new “If you’re sick go home and die” program the stress of money problems has been studied extensively.

In the past many employees have suffered, buying homes they need to maintain, buying new cars and worrying about payments, children become spoiled and demand food, clothes and school, and you worry more. Under the new compassionate pay program these opportunities for stress will be removed.

Now we know that the problem is money, what do we do about it? State employees have demanded that wages be cut on a yearly basis continuing the trend of the past eight years. The cuts must be increased! Once we are all able to file bankruptcy we will only need to earn enough to make sure that we pay our credit cards as not paying them would cause immense pain to McMansion owners and yacht storage facilities. Pay cuts tie nicely into the health care initiative. No worry, no stress, and you can work many more fulfilling years proving your worth by allowing corporate and rich tax rates to be cut.

This leads to another huge savings! Under the new plan you won’t retire until you die, saving the endless worry about what to do in those years you would have been wasting lying around doing nothing. Members formerly sucking the public dry (collecting retirement) will be moved to the homes of current employees and will act as domestic servants giving them a purpose in life and allowing current employees to work even longer hours.

We are not done yet! Every year the state must tax the public to pay for huge numbers of state vehicles. The mostly left wing union says “I want to feel your pain” and has decided that as part of the employment contract all employees will use their own vehicles for any state work necessary with no payment for mileage.

Some people have doubts about the new program but our politicians have promised this new day will lower the state tax level so much that they will consider giving back some of the wages after they study the overall effects. They think there may be raises for state employees as soon as Hell freezes over. (Don’t worry, there is no global warming.)

As its last act the MSEASEIU in recognition of the harm that organized labor has done sent a letter to congress in the names of all former members demanding a raise in gas prices, removal of all labor laws, and a complete dropping of all taxes on anyone that does not have to work for a living.

Maybe someday they can forgive us.

Maybe we are not so bad. Pennsylvania SEIU state employees got 22% over a 4 year contract.

“The reported contract cost of more than $2 billion over the four years is a big number. That translates into a 22.5% increase. The first-year cost alone is equivalent to a 2% increase in the state budget.

Only 484 more members needed.

June 10th, 2007 Posted by narsbars | Uncategorized | no comments

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